Typically, when one thinks about a bully, the image conjured is of a boy who is an outsider, is bigger and tougher than his peers, and who often starts fights and steals lunch money from others. It may be surprising to hear that girls can also be bullies; however there tends to be some gender differences. Even though some girls do engage in physical altercations, most often girls bully by spreading rumors and gossip, excluding others, sharing secrets, and teasing other girls about their hair, weight, intelligence, clothes, etc. Additionally, female bullies will often turn to the Internet as an additional tool to bully their victims. As a parent, there are some typical warning signs to look for. For example, do you notice that your child is being rude or malicious when interacting with others? Do they engage in frequent power struggles with any of their peers? It is always important to have an open dialogue with your children. Discuss what constitutes bullying and what it means to be a good friend. This is one of the best ways to stop bullying before it starts. Girls, like boys, bully for a variety of reasons. They may have learned to bully from their home environment, they may feel insecure and need to feel powerful, they may want attention and popularity, or they may be experiencing personal issues. Further, it is important to help your child understand that the bullied victims often have emotional scars from the experience. Victims may experience symptoms of depression, sleep problems, low self-esteem, academic problems, suicidal ideations, and/or violent rage and aggression against their tormentors. As violence grows in our society, so does bullying. If you are concerned that your child may be a victim of bullying or may be engaging in bullying behavior, seek assistance in managing appropriate interventions with your child.
